Letters to Myself: Entry Sixty-Seven
Prompt: If I truly believed I could leave life right now, what would I stop pretending to have time for?
“You could leave life right now. Let that determine what you do and say and think.”
A reflection on the importance of the time we have; how are we going to use it? Are we going to get up and get after it? Or are we going to waste the time we have and leave it worse than how we found it?
It really does paint perspective on how all of us will be remembered down the line. Sometime not too far away, what will people say about us? The way we look at those in history and only ridicule instead of knowing that they were simply just living; they were surviving the times they were in. Much like most of us right now, it is a tough time; how is there hope to even look at life in this very moment; but simply this question paints the reasons to keep going.
This question and statement makes us remember that what we are doing right now is wasting time. We are wasting all of the time we have on things that are out of our control, we are wasting the energy; the good energy that is meant to be used for virtue; to be better than you were even just a moment ago. That is what I believe this quote represents. It presents urgency to live and survive further; but what are the things that matter to you? For me, its writing. I am invested in my writing and wanting to live in the steps of some of the best writers ever. Furthermore, I really believe in the ideas of legacy considering the ways of histories past; we are trying to survive another day, another year, so we can protect our next generations from experiencing what we went through. And maybe, in a world where we can access so much, it simultaneously destroys us from experiencing the simplistic nature of living a normal day as a human being.
Unfortunately, in a time of much despair, there has to be a continuing path that we must continue on. Recently, I read the book History Matters by David McCullough, where its unpublished works and excerpts, speeches he gave in the past talking about the importance of history. Why we must keep it going and that it is forever going, or as he says, “History, I really believe, is best understood as an unfolding story.” I believe that as well, and I believe right now accepting the nature that is this world is part of it, but we have to continue to forge forward, as the steps we take don’t stop now because of sorrow.
I have been seeing much exhaustion around the places I see; the observations I take in from experiencing a completely phone-screen society. Where if someone is not on their phone guiding every step of their journey, in what excitement does that bring? At what point do you say this has too much of my life and I could be spending the precious thing we have on this planet is time. We are dying every minute, every day. Much like Marcus Aurelius, he lived a life through some of the worst times. And truly the collapse of the Roman Empire is a history piece that people should be looking into and understanding. But Marcus knew in the midst of those hard times, dying could happen at every moment. And instead of being a lazy emperor, he got up and got after it. Which is how we should approach our lives; given the tiredness.
I recently have reflected on some life patterns, which is the endless cycle of disappointments of this life. Most people, if not all, fall into this category in one way shape or form. Disappointment in relationships; disappointments in actions; disappointments in yourself; disappointments in things where it should not be present but ends up coming around. It’s a cycle that is on repeat, but when the reality of a disappointment turns positive, that is the specific momentum we need to hold on to and never lose sight of it. That is where our competitive nature comes out; it is about seeing that positive truth finally come through; the very thing you would be looking for. That is the search we are always looking for; that is what gets us up in the morning; that is what we push for day in and day out; for that positive win. That is what we should be doing with the time we have. Continuing to push through when we are not supposed to. To relax when you are not supposed to.
We are hitting some new ideas; new ways of thinking; new ways of life happening by the second it seems like. And that is something to be proud of as humans; however, it is incredibly sad to see so many people live through a digital landscape. Where it controls our every move. One of the concepts of Memento Mori, much like Marcus is referencing here, is that we could leave this life at any moment and we have to live with that idea. That was how I was able to get over a hump of grief of my own; being off the screen through discipline will take work; but it will be the best work you will ever want to put in. It will guide you to have great relationships; see people again and live in the reality of life; in the present moment. The place we all should be. Not on phones; not on the TV; not on the computer screen; not on anything. Just on the people you care about most; bringing in the thing that you hold dearest to the light and remember why you are here. You are put here to get up and go after the thing you care about the most. You got one go at this and we should all be wanting to make the next days of survival count for the next generations; show them the courage and strength we must have in order to continue our own history in the making. Mark these days to your hearts; it will matter down the line.
Main thought: Reminding yourself that you are going to die puts the things you care about most in the spotlight. And with the limited time you have on this planet, how will you choose to spend that time knowing that those people also have a short time on this earth as well? The thought leads to a better way of thinking and makes you live more with intention, and not procrastination.
This post is part of my "Letters to Myself" series — a weekly free-write blog where I explore personal growth, curiosity, and healing through simple prompts. Sometimes reflective, sometimes fun, but always real. Thank you for being here.
References:
Photo by Kyle Gare
Aurelius, Marcus. Meditations. (c. 161–180 AD)
McCullough, David. History Matters. Simon & Schuster, 2022
